老友记/Friends/六人行 第一季第二集
老友记/Friends/六人行 第一季第四集
2007/11/26 23:58 | by
Topic Today
Dating Language
Phoebe:He walked me to the subway and said 'We should do this again!'
Monica: Uh, no. Loosely translated 'We should do this again' means 'You will never see me naked'.
Joey: Since always. It's like dating language. Y'know, like 'It's not you' means 'It is you'.
社会文明程度在不断提高，民众智商，情商，忍商平均水平也有了长足的进步。直白的语言已经进了博物馆的橱窗，用当代语言交谈，就要有相当read between the line的能力。下面罗列一些当今流行的男女约会用语，并附上解读。虽然有很多特例可以用来证伪，但是这些语言对于很多人来说，是仍然具有普适性的。
女用约会语言部分解读：
1．我们还是当朋友好了——其实你还是有多余的利用价值
2．我想我真的不适合你——我根本就不喜欢你
3．其实你人很好——我不想跟你在一起
4．你人真的很好——我真的不想跟你在一起
5．我的心中牵挂着一个人——那个人是我特地虚设用来挡像你这种人的
6．你给我个时间考虑——没给我时间，我怎么跑得掉......
7．但你的温柔我会铭记在心的——猪头！光温柔是没有用的，还需要钱钱......
8．你真的很可爱——你真的很幼稚。
9．你真的是超级可爱耶——猪头！不要像小朋友一样啦！
10．别急嘛，我们可以先作朋友——我可以趁这个时间找男朋友
男用约会语言部分解读：
1. 我过会儿再打电话给你。(下辈子吧！)
2. 其实我刚刚一直在想你。(昨天没有，前天也没有。)
3. 我绝对不会告诉别人。(认识的人除外)
4. 你的过去我不在乎。(如果你没做什么坏事的话)
5. 你是我的唯一……(唯一不知情的)
6. 这一次我是认真的！(这是男人的口头禅)
7.我爱你。(期限到我不爱你为止)
8.相信我，我跟她己经分了。(分？是分不清楚啊！)
9.我绝对不会说谎！(但是也不会说实话)
10.我最近会到南(北、中)部出差。(别忘了告诉他你在搜集旅馆的火柴盒，请他务必带回来。)
音外画：善意的谎言 cushions the blow
Joey: Yeah. Cushions the blow.
Chandler: Yeah, it's like when you're a kid, and your parents put your dog to sleep, and they tell you it went off to live on some farm.
画外音：How long is it?
Monica: No, no, no. They say it's the same as the distance from the tip of a guy's thumb to the tip of his index finger.
Joey: That's ridiculous!
Ross: Can I use.. either thumb?
-----------------------------------------------------------
Monica: Wait a minute! We're talking about someone that I'm going out with?
All: Yeah!
Rachel: And did you notice...? (She spreads her thumb and index finger.)
The Guys: (reluctantly) Yeah.
食色性也。古往今来，尤其是近年来随着观念的开放，茶余饭后，饮食男女越来越多地谈及与性有关的话题。而谈及性话题，难免要提及“阴茎”的话题。
就像男人们搞出好多判断女性胸部真实大小的诀窍一样，女性们也一直试图得出从可视的外表来判断男性宝贝大小的诀窍。诸如看脚，看手，看鼻子等等，可谓精彩纷呈、不一而足。
在friends 剧情中，有关这方面的讨论不只一处。甚至 Rachel 也竟然用刚从 Mon 那里学来的判断标准来帮 Mon 考察 little Alan 的大小, 你可曾有以这种方式 look after your best friends 呢？呵呵.
医学报告指出：大约每3个男人中，就有2个人觉得自己的阴茎太短太细！可见男性朋友在潜意识中，是多么希望自己够更长更粗！而且，在这方面丢人，对男性来说，无疑是对自尊心致命的打击。这样，我们就更容易理解 Ross 为什么会说： Can I use.. either thumb?
现代的女性们也经常互相谈论自己伴侣的勃起长度是否够长够大。根据国内权威人士调查，以种族来看，巴西男性勃起时平均14.5公分，美国男性12.89公分，中国男性则是11.39公分；亚洲人阴茎都比外国人短，这是种族决定的，一般讲，勃起以后不少于10公分都属于正常的。
至于大拇指到食指之间的距离，同几个老友测量了一下，一般都在16-19公分之间，到底有没有联系，具不具备普适标准，只能是如人饮水了。
另外，医学界发表的权威阴茎勃起长度公式表明，只要知道一个男人的身高，就能利用简单的数学计算过程，算出他的勃起长度。即：（7.41+0.06*一个男人的身高公分数）*0.65。这也是女性潜意识中普遍喜欢身材较为高大男性的原因之一。
专家也表示身高矮的男性也别伤心，因为这个计算公式虽然适用大部分的男性，但是你说不定是少数不一样的特例。还有专家认为，事实上一个男人的阴茎在勃起时只要达到5公分就够用了，太过巨大反而会让女方不舒服！
那么到底 How long is it ?
与其这样才来猜去，还真不如自己测一下。
中国市面上刚推出一种新型安全套，是国内三大安全套生产厂商之一的高邦集团设计生产的。据称，通过其刻度安全套的测量数据，能让更多的男性消费者了解自身的情况，不再为大小而感到困惑。
据描述该产品特点是在安全套身部、储精囊处均有刻度，可有两种功能，一个是可丈量生殖器勃起时的长度，二是可测量精液量的多少。根据世界卫生组织(WHO)所规定的正常精液标准，男性的一次排精量应在2毫升～7毫升之间，健康成年男子每次排出的精液，随着节欲前时间的长短，排出的量也有所不同。禁欲时间越久，贮存在体内的精子也就越多。禁欲时间长，精液量5日内没有排过精(包括性交和手淫的排精)之后的第6天排精量达到3～5毫升，精液量最多者可达10毫升；如果性生活频繁，精液量会越来越少，少至仅有几滴。刻度套的体液测量也让女性考验对方的忠诚度成为现实。
Odds & Ends
Joey: "Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over. But you'll have to live with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die."
Chandler: Alright, now try taking a puff.
Chandler: Don't think of it as a cigarette. Think of it as the thing that's been missing from your hand. When you're holding it, you feel right. You feel complete.
Phoebe: It's nothing, it's just- Okay. I'm going through my mail, and I open up their monthly, you know, STATEMENT-
Chandler: Oh, Satan's minions at work again...
Phoebe: Okay. I'd- just- I'd never be able to enjoy it. It would be like this giant karmic debt.
这里 Phoebe 所说的 Giant Karmic debt 其实就是一种因果轮回的思想。 类似于一部电影中的经典台词：出来混，迟早都要还的。
Monica: Look, I don't even know how I feel about him yet. Just give me a chance to figure that out.
Monica: I mean, why should I let them meet him? I mean, I bring a guy home, and within five minutes they're all over him. I mean, they're like- coyotes, picking off the weak members of the herd.
Paula: Listen. As someone who's seen more than her fair share of bad beef, I'll tell you: that is not such a terrible thing. I mean, they're your friends, they're just looking out after you.
Paula: Well, you do realise the odds of that happening are a little slimmer if they never get to meet the guy..
Joey: You can come in, but your filter-tipped little buddy has to stay outside!
Phoebe: 'Dear Ms. Buffay. Thank you for calling attention to our error. We have credited your account with five hundred dollars. We're sorry for the inconvenience, and hope you'll accept this- (Searches in her purse) -football phone as our free gift.' Do you believe this?! Now I have a thousand dollars, and a football phone!
Monica: (to Alan) Thanks. I'll call you tomorrow. (Alan exits, to all) Okay. Okay, let's let the Alan-bashing begin. Who's gonna take the first shot, hmm?
Ross: ...So I think Alan will become the yardstick against which all future boyfriends will be measured.
Rachel: I mean, it-it was like, it was like he made us into a team.
Chandler: Yep, we sure showed those Hassidic jewellers a thing or two about softball..
Ross: Yeah, it's his, uh, innate Alan-ness that-that-that we adore.
Chandler: Well, maybe it's a contest, y'know? Like, collect all five?
Chandler: So I have a flaw! Big deal! Like Joey's constant knuckle-cracking isn't annoying? And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word? And Monica, with that snort when she laughs? I mean, what the hell is that thing? ...I accept all those flaws, why can't you accept me for this?
Rachel: Ohh-ho-hooohhh. The hair comes out, and the gloves come on.
Paula: Waitwait.. we talking about the coyotes here? All right, a cow got through!
Monica: Can you believe it? ...Y'know what? I just don't feel the thing. I mean, they feel the thing, I don't feel the thing.
Paula: Honey.. you should always feel the thing. Listen, if that's how you feel about the guy, Monica, dump him!
Monica: I know.. it's gonna be really hard.
Paula: Well, he's a big boy, he'll get over it.
Chandler: I have one now and then. no-one- no-one's ever put it like that before.
Chandler: Joey ate my last stick of gum, so I killed him. Do you think that was wrong?
Phoebe: And on my way over here, I stepped in gum. ...What is up with the universe?!
Joey: Even nicer when everyone gets to wear their underwear..
Phoebe: Wait, wait, I'm getting a deja vu...no, I'm not.
The opposite of déjà vu is jamais vu.
Phoebe: You know.. you let your guard down, you start to really care about someone, and I just- I- (starts chewing her hair)
Dating Language
Phoebe:He walked me to the subway and said 'We should do this again!'
Monica: Uh, no. Loosely translated 'We should do this again' means 'You will never see me naked'.
Joey: Since always. It's like dating language. Y'know, like 'It's not you' means 'It is you'.
社会文明程度在不断提高，民众智商，情商，忍商平均水平也有了长足的进步。直白的语言已经进了博物馆的橱窗，用当代语言交谈，就要有相当read between the line的能力。下面罗列一些当今流行的男女约会用语，并附上解读。虽然有很多特例可以用来证伪，但是这些语言对于很多人来说，是仍然具有普适性的。
女用约会语言部分解读：
1．我们还是当朋友好了——其实你还是有多余的利用价值
2．我想我真的不适合你——我根本就不喜欢你
3．其实你人很好——我不想跟你在一起
4．你人真的很好——我真的不想跟你在一起
5．我的心中牵挂着一个人——那个人是我特地虚设用来挡像你这种人的
6．你给我个时间考虑——没给我时间，我怎么跑得掉......
7．但你的温柔我会铭记在心的——猪头！光温柔是没有用的，还需要钱钱......
8．你真的很可爱——你真的很幼稚。
9．你真的是超级可爱耶——猪头！不要像小朋友一样啦！
10．别急嘛，我们可以先作朋友——我可以趁这个时间找男朋友
男用约会语言部分解读：
1. 我过会儿再打电话给你。(下辈子吧！)
2. 其实我刚刚一直在想你。(昨天没有，前天也没有。)
3. 我绝对不会告诉别人。(认识的人除外)
4. 你的过去我不在乎。(如果你没做什么坏事的话)
5. 你是我的唯一……(唯一不知情的)
6. 这一次我是认真的！(这是男人的口头禅)
7.我爱你。(期限到我不爱你为止)
8.相信我，我跟她己经分了。(分？是分不清楚啊！)
9.我绝对不会说谎！(但是也不会说实话)
10.我最近会到南(北、中)部出差。(别忘了告诉他你在搜集旅馆的火柴盒，请他务必带回来。)
音外画：善意的谎言 cushions the blow
Joey: Yeah. Cushions the blow.
Chandler: Yeah, it's like when you're a kid, and your parents put your dog to sleep, and they tell you it went off to live on some farm.
画外音：How long is it?
Monica: No, no, no. They say it's the same as the distance from the tip of a guy's thumb to the tip of his index finger.
Joey: That's ridiculous!
Ross: Can I use.. either thumb?
-----------------------------------------------------------
Monica: Wait a minute! We're talking about someone that I'm going out with?
All: Yeah!
Rachel: And did you notice...? (She spreads her thumb and index finger.)
The Guys: (reluctantly) Yeah.
食色性也。古往今来，尤其是近年来随着观念的开放，茶余饭后，饮食男女越来越多地谈及与性有关的话题。而谈及性话题，难免要提及“阴茎”的话题。
就像男人们搞出好多判断女性胸部真实大小的诀窍一样，女性们也一直试图得出从可视的外表来判断男性宝贝大小的诀窍。诸如看脚，看手，看鼻子等等，可谓精彩纷呈、不一而足。
在friends 剧情中，有关这方面的讨论不只一处。甚至 Rachel 也竟然用刚从 Mon 那里学来的判断标准来帮 Mon 考察 little Alan 的大小, 你可曾有以这种方式 look after your best friends 呢？呵呵.
医学报告指出：大约每3个男人中，就有2个人觉得自己的阴茎太短太细！可见男性朋友在潜意识中，是多么希望自己够更长更粗！而且，在这方面丢人，对男性来说，无疑是对自尊心致命的打击。这样，我们就更容易理解 Ross 为什么会说： Can I use.. either thumb?
现代的女性们也经常互相谈论自己伴侣的勃起长度是否够长够大。根据国内权威人士调查，以种族来看，巴西男性勃起时平均14.5公分，美国男性12.89公分，中国男性则是11.39公分；亚洲人阴茎都比外国人短，这是种族决定的，一般讲，勃起以后不少于10公分都属于正常的。
至于大拇指到食指之间的距离，同几个老友测量了一下，一般都在16-19公分之间，到底有没有联系，具不具备普适标准，只能是如人饮水了。
另外，医学界发表的权威阴茎勃起长度公式表明，只要知道一个男人的身高，就能利用简单的数学计算过程，算出他的勃起长度。即：（7.41+0.06*一个男人的身高公分数）*0.65。这也是女性潜意识中普遍喜欢身材较为高大男性的原因之一。
专家也表示身高矮的男性也别伤心，因为这个计算公式虽然适用大部分的男性，但是你说不定是少数不一样的特例。还有专家认为，事实上一个男人的阴茎在勃起时只要达到5公分就够用了，太过巨大反而会让女方不舒服！
那么到底 How long is it ?
与其这样才来猜去，还真不如自己测一下。
中国市面上刚推出一种新型安全套，是国内三大安全套生产厂商之一的高邦集团设计生产的。据称，通过其刻度安全套的测量数据，能让更多的男性消费者了解自身的情况，不再为大小而感到困惑。
据描述该产品特点是在安全套身部、储精囊处均有刻度，可有两种功能，一个是可丈量生殖器勃起时的长度，二是可测量精液量的多少。根据世界卫生组织(WHO)所规定的正常精液标准，男性的一次排精量应在2毫升～7毫升之间，健康成年男子每次排出的精液，随着节欲前时间的长短，排出的量也有所不同。禁欲时间越久，贮存在体内的精子也就越多。禁欲时间长，精液量5日内没有排过精(包括性交和手淫的排精)之后的第6天排精量达到3～5毫升，精液量最多者可达10毫升；如果性生活频繁，精液量会越来越少，少至仅有几滴。刻度套的体液测量也让女性考验对方的忠诚度成为现实。
Odds & Ends
Joey: "Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over. But you'll have to live with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die."
Chandler: Alright, now try taking a puff.
Chandler: Don't think of it as a cigarette. Think of it as the thing that's been missing from your hand. When you're holding it, you feel right. You feel complete.
Phoebe: It's nothing, it's just- Okay. I'm going through my mail, and I open up their monthly, you know, STATEMENT-
Chandler: Oh, Satan's minions at work again...
Phoebe: Okay. I'd- just- I'd never be able to enjoy it. It would be like this giant karmic debt.
这里 Phoebe 所说的 Giant Karmic debt 其实就是一种因果轮回的思想。 类似于一部电影中的经典台词：出来混，迟早都要还的。
Monica: Look, I don't even know how I feel about him yet. Just give me a chance to figure that out.
Monica: I mean, why should I let them meet him? I mean, I bring a guy home, and within five minutes they're all over him. I mean, they're like- coyotes, picking off the weak members of the herd.
Paula: Listen. As someone who's seen more than her fair share of bad beef, I'll tell you: that is not such a terrible thing. I mean, they're your friends, they're just looking out after you.
Paula: Well, you do realise the odds of that happening are a little slimmer if they never get to meet the guy..
Joey: You can come in, but your filter-tipped little buddy has to stay outside!
Phoebe: 'Dear Ms. Buffay. Thank you for calling attention to our error. We have credited your account with five hundred dollars. We're sorry for the inconvenience, and hope you'll accept this- (Searches in her purse) -football phone as our free gift.' Do you believe this?! Now I have a thousand dollars, and a football phone!
Monica: (to Alan) Thanks. I'll call you tomorrow. (Alan exits, to all) Okay. Okay, let's let the Alan-bashing begin. Who's gonna take the first shot, hmm?
Ross: ...So I think Alan will become the yardstick against which all future boyfriends will be measured.
Rachel: I mean, it-it was like, it was like he made us into a team.
Chandler: Yep, we sure showed those Hassidic jewellers a thing or two about softball..
Ross: Yeah, it's his, uh, innate Alan-ness that-that-that we adore.
Chandler: Well, maybe it's a contest, y'know? Like, collect all five?
Chandler: So I have a flaw! Big deal! Like Joey's constant knuckle-cracking isn't annoying? And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word? And Monica, with that snort when she laughs? I mean, what the hell is that thing? ...I accept all those flaws, why can't you accept me for this?
Rachel: Ohh-ho-hooohhh. The hair comes out, and the gloves come on.
Paula: Waitwait.. we talking about the coyotes here? All right, a cow got through!
Monica: Can you believe it? ...Y'know what? I just don't feel the thing. I mean, they feel the thing, I don't feel the thing.
Paula: Honey.. you should always feel the thing. Listen, if that's how you feel about the guy, Monica, dump him!
Monica: I know.. it's gonna be really hard.
Paula: Well, he's a big boy, he'll get over it.
Chandler: I have one now and then. no-one- no-one's ever put it like that before.
Chandler: Joey ate my last stick of gum, so I killed him. Do you think that was wrong?
Phoebe: And on my way over here, I stepped in gum. ...What is up with the universe?!
Joey: Even nicer when everyone gets to wear their underwear..
Phoebe: Wait, wait, I'm getting a deja vu...no, I'm not.
The opposite of déjà vu is jamais vu.
Phoebe: You know.. you let your guard down, you start to really care about someone, and I just- I- (starts chewing her hair)
